3 drams golden syrup 1 cup alkaline water 2 cups sauce 1 carton Hong Kong flour 6 Cups of Vegetable or Chicken Broth 1 Cup of Cream 1 Live Turkey 1 teaspoon of ground Nutmeg 1 Tablespoon of ground Cumin Salt and White Pepper to Taste
Dissolve the salt in 2 gallons of cold water in a large stockpot. Obtain live turkey. Ivanov gives this to you after you give him enough paint to finish his mural. Add the live turkey and refrigerate for 12 hours. Make sure the turkey has a blanket and turn on a radio to keep it entertained. The turkey likes smooth jazz and soft rock. Classical music will cause damage to the refrigerator.
Heat the pan. Then, lower the heat to medium-high & shake the pan continuously. Turn off the heat. Go sit down. Mix cream with golden syrup. Chug to taste. Go back to pan. Turn on heat, for reals this time. Turn that heat up high. Higher! Oh yeah. That's the stuff.
Add sauce to hot pan. Careful -- it's hot. Place a plate over it & invert. Oops... Clean floor. Watch your feet this time.
Lightly coat the skillet with oil, slide the turkey into the pan, & brown, shaking all the while. Lower the heat to medium. Say hello to the turkey. Keep it distracted while you put nutmeg on its tail. Form into oiled turkey into loaf. Firmly insert loaf into bucket. Mash until saucy.
Serve at once.